Some couples are awful, aren't they?
Especially when you get stuck on some kind of hellish "double date" with them. One of them is bound to be a friend of yours making it all the more horrifying to watch them interact. Sometimes it's annoying nit-picking, sometimes it's downright abusive; sometimes it's right there in front of your face and sometimes it's under the surface; but fuck, it's a pain to watch. If you're going to act like that, why must you force me to watch?
This leads to the obvious bout of friends trying to split this couple up, failing, and often times giving up and falling out or "loosing touch" with them. A couple like this will not be broken or fixed by anyone but themselves. Sometimes people enjoy being in the rush of a tumultuous relationship, the drama of going to their friends in tears and being told how they're "better than this" because it's straight out of a soap story.
Then there are those couples that are sickly sweet to each other, never fight and constantly try to dish out advice that's usually useless. They're always so smug that they can be just as much of a pain to be around as couples who are at each other's throats. They generally aren't as perfect as they make out, their happy faces hiding some bigger problems, or maybe just lots of little ones.
Most couples are somewhere in the middle, love is not a problem but the other things associated with a partnership can be difficult, be it household chores, money, or sex. Let's face it; no matter how happy or angsty your relationship, your friends don't really want to hear about it. The only reason to change is for your own happiness and that of your partner.
If you read any men's magazine with an article on pleasing your other half, the focus is often on how big your muscles are, how long you last in bed or how many positions you can do. Women's magazines talk about make up and sexual favours. Sex isn't the only way to keep a lover happy, but even so these magazines don't always have the right idea, and there is nothing worse than a lover who thinks they're amazing because they've read all the books and all the partners they've had have told them how great they are, afraid to hurt their feelings or just not wanting a crier on their hands ("I'm sorry *sob* I'm so terrible *sob* you deserve better" etc).
This is why I am here, not to solve any deep issues with individuals but to give universally good advice on how to be a better boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife. Most of it will not be about sex, either.
A little about me: I'm just coming up on 26 years old, engaged to a man 8 years older. I've been engaged for three and a half years out of the four and a half we've been together. We've lived together for most of our relationship and supported each other through a lot. We got pregnant by accident and then miscarried at five months, all whilst my mother was dying of ovarian cancer. He was fresh out of a previous marriage when we got together and we even spent some time being friendly with the ex wife. Money and housework are a constant issue, so I think I'm well equipped to speak knowledgeably about such matters. Our relationship isn't perfect, but we do have a lot of experience. A lot more than a 26 year old would be expected to have.
Be aware that these lessons will require work, sometimes hard, and in some cases they will open you up to more work for the rest of your life. But if your loved one is worth it, you should be able to handle it.
Especially when you get stuck on some kind of hellish "double date" with them. One of them is bound to be a friend of yours making it all the more horrifying to watch them interact. Sometimes it's annoying nit-picking, sometimes it's downright abusive; sometimes it's right there in front of your face and sometimes it's under the surface; but fuck, it's a pain to watch. If you're going to act like that, why must you force me to watch?
This leads to the obvious bout of friends trying to split this couple up, failing, and often times giving up and falling out or "loosing touch" with them. A couple like this will not be broken or fixed by anyone but themselves. Sometimes people enjoy being in the rush of a tumultuous relationship, the drama of going to their friends in tears and being told how they're "better than this" because it's straight out of a soap story.
Then there are those couples that are sickly sweet to each other, never fight and constantly try to dish out advice that's usually useless. They're always so smug that they can be just as much of a pain to be around as couples who are at each other's throats. They generally aren't as perfect as they make out, their happy faces hiding some bigger problems, or maybe just lots of little ones.
Most couples are somewhere in the middle, love is not a problem but the other things associated with a partnership can be difficult, be it household chores, money, or sex. Let's face it; no matter how happy or angsty your relationship, your friends don't really want to hear about it. The only reason to change is for your own happiness and that of your partner.
If you read any men's magazine with an article on pleasing your other half, the focus is often on how big your muscles are, how long you last in bed or how many positions you can do. Women's magazines talk about make up and sexual favours. Sex isn't the only way to keep a lover happy, but even so these magazines don't always have the right idea, and there is nothing worse than a lover who thinks they're amazing because they've read all the books and all the partners they've had have told them how great they are, afraid to hurt their feelings or just not wanting a crier on their hands ("I'm sorry *sob* I'm so terrible *sob* you deserve better" etc).
This is why I am here, not to solve any deep issues with individuals but to give universally good advice on how to be a better boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife. Most of it will not be about sex, either.
A little about me: I'm just coming up on 26 years old, engaged to a man 8 years older. I've been engaged for three and a half years out of the four and a half we've been together. We've lived together for most of our relationship and supported each other through a lot. We got pregnant by accident and then miscarried at five months, all whilst my mother was dying of ovarian cancer. He was fresh out of a previous marriage when we got together and we even spent some time being friendly with the ex wife. Money and housework are a constant issue, so I think I'm well equipped to speak knowledgeably about such matters. Our relationship isn't perfect, but we do have a lot of experience. A lot more than a 26 year old would be expected to have.
Be aware that these lessons will require work, sometimes hard, and in some cases they will open you up to more work for the rest of your life. But if your loved one is worth it, you should be able to handle it.
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